Bolton’s 1st XV welcomed Garstang to Avenue Street in what promised to be a great spectacle as Bolton’s two previous games saw the two top teams in the league victor over the Bull Frogs.

With the tree’s of the theatre whistling around like toothless heroin addict and the ground soft underfoot it was clear winter had more or less arrived at Mortfield Pavilion, something that scares supporters and many players alike and with the added incentive of international rugby on the TV inside the clubhouse the usual tough Bolton crowd seemed outshone by the travelling Garstang contingent who with only 4000 people living in the town seemed to bring half to watch the local rugby team play, for more information on Garstang and its ability in being the capital of Fair trade please visit www.JP-Hardman.co.uk/programme-populators.org .

Bolton started the game like a fat man running down hill, slow to get going, unstoppable for a period but in the end having an asthma attack and dying short of the finish. The two teams clashed in the forwards throughout this close encounter as Bolton dominated the loose and Garstang the open play and likewise in the backs with both teams counter attacking when possible.

Bolton kicked two penalties through Shane “Evander” O’Sullivan before the break with Garstang scoring a try and kicking a penalty.

Half Time Score: Bolton 1st XV 6 – 8 Garstang 1st XV

The second half saw Bolton dominating proceedings via possession in the forwards, marching up the field time after time only for the ball to either be kicked back down the throat of the Bolton back three or ran back on the counter.

As Bolton marched over the line from a 5m lineout, Ash “Sewer Moat” Cooper the beneficiary for all the Bolton forwards hard work in the corner, the conversion missed. This meant the scores were even at 14-14 after exchanging penalties around the hour mark.

From the resulting kick off Bolton ensured their fate as an unlikely drop from the kick saw the egg fly hacked through and instead of clearing the lines Bolton played hot potato for 1 minute and the uncompromising Garstang attack pounced like Peter Sutcliffe in a dark alley, the conversion added.

Although Bolton had time to get back into the game Garstang’s defence held strong and they went away with a win, Bolton just the losing bonus point.

Final Score: Bolton 1st XV 14 – 21 Garstang 1st XV

The Jimmy “Super fly” Snuka MOTM award: Chris Mee

Scorers: Cooper,

Penalties: O’Sullivan x 3

Quote of the day: “Ouch….I have the gayest dead leg ever witnessed” (Drama queen / religious expert Mike Singleton)

* The Bolton back three in a joint venture have released the book “Juggling for beginners” where they discuss new and improved ways to juggle balls in the most obscure places. The foreword is written by John “GHD” Stryker and the book dedicated to amputee’s around the world.

** Les Towers 3rd book “Balls are for cleaning, woods are for storing” is another auto-biography written by Bolton’s self proclaimed clubman of the year 12 years running.

*** If you would like a team name please visit www.Alex-Youngmans-random-team-names.co.uk/Christopher-Reeves