Bolton 2nd XV Beat Oldham at Avenue Street

A breakaway from the Oldham winger allowed Oldham to score the first try of the day, the conversion missed from out wide.

Bolton woke up and began to play their game dominating the lineout and making yards mauling the ball down field. Usual hard running from Matthew 'He should be a Chippendale' Parrish and Mark 'Flying Pig' Townsend gave a good platform for the Bolton attacks.

Bolton first try came from Matthew 'Champagne Rugby' Parrish crashing over from short range under the posts, the try converted by Fat 10 Tom Price.

Bolton continued to run hard and make yards with some bloke who's name isn't important right now making the back line tick. Allegedly this same person scored a try last week... but I'm not so sure.

Bolton scored again through the forwards with Alex Quegan scoring from the back of a rolling maul, the conversions kicked by Tom Price.

Matthew 'Naturally Athletic' Parrish added his second of the game with another short range crash over the line. The conversion missed by Price.

Half Time Score 19-5

Bolton restarted the game and continued to control possession with Oldham not getting much opportunity to attack. Bolton's third try came from a good forward play sucking in defenders before the ball was spread wide.

Pete Marriott gave a miss pass to Stu Evans who beat the full back to score, the conversion missed.

Another hamstring injury to literal man of glass Rick 'Apparently the thin twin but still pretty tubby' Sandbrook allowed Rob Kopicki to make his first appearance this season.

A penalty on the Oldham line set up Bolton's next try. Bolton opted for a lineout, and caught and drove over the Oldham line for skipper Nick 'The fat twin' Sandbrook to get his first try of the season, the extras added by Tom Price. Obviously we don't need to point out at this stage that Nick wasn't jumping in the line, Bolton literally didn't have enough players on the pitch to get his lardy frame off the floor. Nick nearly failed to score, having smelled the after match pies cooking in the club house and seriously considering substituting himself.

Tom Price then worked his own try as he spotted space behind the Oldham defensive line and chipped over in the Oldham 22 and got the luck of the bounce and collected to score his second of the season. The conversion kicked by Price.

Final Score 38-5.

Tries: Matthew Parrish x 2, Alex Quegan, Nick Sandbrook, Stu Evans, Tom Price

Best tackle - Mark Townsend for a bone crunching smash on the Oldham 12

Most damage to the pitch whilst scoring a try award: Nick 'I think you are really fat, but my gosh... don't you just know it' Sandbrook

Fastest injury trophy: Ian 'matching socks and boxer short set' Morton

Most Pointless piece of information during a rugby game award: The 7 people who told me that Nat's car had failed its MOT