Oldham 2XV vs Bolton 2XV

0-5mins – Dave Ormes left the field due to a broken heart. Team player.

5-10mins – Oldham kicked a penalty. Nice kick.

10-30mins – Bolton dominated possession and Grinder model Oli Relph forgot to put the ball down over the line. Denial.

30-40mins – Bolton continued to dominate but couldn’t break through. Solid 90.

40-50mins – Bolton scored two tries through Fruit corner fanatic James Howarth and outrageously passionate lover Manny Tailor*. Mmmmmm passionate.

50-60mins – Bolton score a try after an Oldham mistake, Pasty muncher Chris Turner diving over the whitewash. Shamu.

60–70mins –Bolton score again after a barnstorming run from War hero Simon Frost who off loaded to athlete and lingerie model Geoff Earle who crashed over from 30m. Armed forces.

70-80mins – Bolton held out after a series of Oldham attacks. Jeff Goldblum.

Final Score: Oldham 2nd XV 3 – 24 Bolton 2nd XV

The Pete Marriott RFU code of conduct MOTM award: Josh Richardson

Tries: Howarth, Earle, Turner, Tailor

Convs: Terry x 2.

Pens: N/A

Dodgy Comment of the day: “I am not allowed to eat dairy products, it’s part of the ban my girlfriend has put on me” (Mike Singleton, 2013)
*Manny Tailor’s book “Tales from between the passionate quilt” is out on Monday 14th October 2013.

Regards,

Nash Bridges

Twitter: @nashbridgesNB

EVERYTHING LISTED ABOVE IS PURELY THE THOUGHTS AND VIEWS OF AN UNKNOWN SPECTATOR AND NOT THE VIEWS OF A PLAYER WITHIN THE SQUAD.