Who ate all the Pies ?

Thornton Cleveleys 2nd 38 Bolton 4th 14

As Bolton emerged for their first game since before Xmas, it was clear that several members of the team had been responsible for the worldwide mince pie shortage. Mark "Mr Kipling" Higgins had apparently single-handedly eaten all those intended for the Indian sub continent, whilst Mark "Nom, nom, nom" Down had just . . . eaten all the pies.
The game started with early mid pitch tussles with both sides testing the other and avoiding the puddles and dog cr@p on the pitch. Bolton extra weight was put to good use in the scrum, but left them looking exposed in the open. A good break by Eldon "Elvis" Taytopie down the wing took play up to the Thornton 22m. From the resulting scrum, scrum half Sam Kelly pushed a weighted grubber kick thru, and chasing wing forward Alex "panda" Charnock picked it up and ran thru the defence to score under the posts. (Actually what happened was - Kelly received the ball at the back of the scrum and dropped it. When it sploshed onto the ground he kicked it in disgust past the scrum. Charnock saw the ball go past him and gave chase. Thornton did nothing cos they thought the ref would blow his whistle. To his credit he did beat the full back to score.) Keith Howie added the conversion. At this point Mark Down's back could no longer support his eating habit and he had to leave the field of play. Thornton lent us a prop, thank you, so that contested scrums would continue. In the latter parts of the half, continuous Thornton pressure started to tell as they scored 2 tries in quick succession. Half time, Bolton trail 14 - 7.
The second half carried on as the first one finished, with Thornton scoring 3 unanswered tries as the Bolton defence began to run out of steam. Young Jacob Buckley, playing his first Senior game, put in some good tackles from his unaccustomed position on the wing. Another first timer, James "silent Bob" Lock, carried well in the centre and was rewarded with a try when he forced his way over the line. Howie added the extra points. In the closing minutes, Thornton added a further try.
Final score Thornton 38 Bolton 14.